Rating: Zero Stars
Tom Six must have had his head stuck up his ass when he came up with the idea for “The Human Centipede”. Here is an individual who considers his films as, and I quote, “works of art”. If he is correct, and we have indeed reached the point where a movie called “The Human Centipede” can be classified as art, then we might as well bestow the next available Pulitzer Prize to Stephanie Meyer.
The first “Centipede” movie dropped an oversized dump on human civilization. To confess that I was bothered by it would be inaccurate. I was violated. Excluding people with facial tattoos, criminal records, and schizophrenia, I suspect that not many folks threw coins at a well in wish of a sequel. And yet here it is. “Full Sequence”, which is infinitely more vile and despicable than its predecessor, has only one purpose behind its miserable existence, and that is to update us that the head of Tom Six is still lodged up somewhere within his anal crevices. Home Sweet Home.
The 87 minutes I spent with “The Human Centipede II” marks the 87 most depressing minutes I have ever spent with any movie so far in my life. This is especially true for the movie’s final reel, where bags and bags of feces, solid and liquid, are ruthlessly unloaded at the screen. During this carnival of excrements, I felt that my eyes were being treated as toilet paper.
The notion of constructing a human centipede by surgically attaching three people via ass to mouth suggests moral depravity. It is a concept that cannot be redeemed by artistry, yet somehow the first movie, which received 2 Stars from me, was restrained and disciplined. The conjoining of the three victims was not depicted onscreen. Its deranged and delusional villain, Dr. Heiter, exhibited the proud stance of a skilled surgeon and the scathing speech of a Nazi officer. Dr. Heiter was, to say the least, interesting.
But alas, Dr. Heiter has been replaced by Martin, a mentally-handicapped security guard who repeatedly watches “The Human Centipede”; his dream of creating his own centipede grows with each view of the film. Fat, short, sweaty, and dumb, Martin never utters a single word throughout the movie. His vocabulary mainly consists of grunts, screeches, laughs, and fart noises. He abducts the actress Ashlynn Yennie, whose character can be found right at the middle of the centipede in the first movie. In this sequel, she has been promoted to the front of the line. Hooray. The body count has now been extended to twelve people. That is four times the length of the original centipede, and perhaps in Tom Six’s eyes, four times scarier. At least he knows basic Math.
The victims, once collected, are assembled. But because Martin does not possess the surgical tools and expertise required to create a human centipede, he uses kitchen appliances instead, and undergoes a series of Trial and Error. Contrary to the first film, we see every step of the process. This is all extremely brutal, but it is neither the sadism nor the depravity that upsets me. Any uneducated asshole out there can produce a violent movie. But a violent movie with story, relevance, and creativity will always involve more guts and more intellect, which are two things that Tom Six does not seem to have. At least he knows basic Math.
Scarce are directors who make movies just to draw attention to themselves. Tom Six utilizes poop to attain publicity in Hollywood the same way a neglected gorilla at a zoo attracts an audience by throwing its poop at unprepared visitors. How incredibly pathetic. This guy seriously needs to grow up. He could start by taking his head out his anal crevices. There should be light at the end of the tunnel.
Note: “The Human Centipede II (Full Sequence)” is entirely in Black &White, and it pains me to reveal that it is the first B&W film I have reviewed on this website. Not a film by Buster Keaton. Or by John Ford. Or by Akira Kurosawa. But by Tom Six. What have I done? Tom Six isn’t the only one who should be ashamed of himself.
Tom Six
Interesting film. It starts very compellingly, and initially plays like an art house psychological horror à la David Lynch’s Eraserhead or Abel Ferrara’s Driller Killer. It’s brilliantly acted by the lead, whose performance — with no dialogue — is far better than the genre expects and is worthy of recognition. And the meta premise — it’s about a man obsessed with the first film to the point of reenacting its atrocities — is both original and intelligently handled (hilarious that this has gone straight over the heads of the BBFC and all the Daily Mail-type-antis).
Unfortunately, you’re quite correct in your final analysis: none of this is sustained and the film can’t wait to explore the scatological implications of the first one and descends in its last reel into nothing more than a gross-out. As far as the violence is concerned, the BBFC have passed much stronger material without any hoo-hah, so I can only assume this is the real reason they feel the delicate flowers of the UK must be denied the chance to judge it for themselves.
twitter.com/seamaster73
I understand what your trying to say in the first paragraph. The earlier portions of the movie showed minuscule signs of entertainment (meta premise), but I try to see movies based on its intent and how it is presented. And by the time the film drew to its final third, I found myself to be a victim of a cruel, immature, and unfunny practical joke. Tom Six doesn’t want to provide any insight, entertainment, and even horror. That the film is artless makes it all the more deserving of a Zero Star rating.
Thank you for your feedback.
wierd movie doesn’t teach you nothin at all, why waste money on this, but whatever his money , the creator is a crazy f****r…